I realize we Floridians will not gain a bit of sympathy from y\u2019all UPN.\u00a0 But dang it!\u00a0 It\u2019s cold!\u00a0 And this is Florida.<\/p>\n
Right now, sitting in my office while writing this, the outside air temperature is 39 degrees F.\u00a0 I know many of you from UPN are beginning to laugh your butts off.\u00a0 Yesterday morning one of the anchors on the morning news broadcasting out of New York mentioned the temperature in Tampa would be 68 degrees F.\u00a0 \u201cIt\u2019s warm enough go to the beach!\u201d<\/p>\n
I looked at my wife and she looked at me with a look of incredulity.\u00a0 \u201cDoesn\u2019t that woman know there is not a Floridian in their right mind who would go to the beach on a day so cold?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cShe\u2019s from UPN,\u201d I tell my wife.\u00a0 \u201cShe has no clue.\u201d<\/p>\n
Just so you know, real Floridians hardly ever go to the beach in the spring, summer, and fall – and By Golly, we never<\/em> ever go to the beach when the temperature slides below 76 degrees F.<\/p>\n Right about now, I know one of my blogging buddies who lives in Minnesota is rolling her eyes to the back of her head.\u00a0 Stop it!\u00a0 We can\u2019t help it if the cold shrivels us, pretty well rendering us incapable of functioning.<\/p>\n I read her blog last week about the snow.\u00a0 She had photos of cows standing in the snow.\u00a0 When I saw these cows, I immediately thought of our last trip to California.\u00a0 Driving down the Pacific Coast Highway, my wife marveled at the cows who were enjoying the life of Riley living on prime oceanfront pastures.\u00a0 I believe these cows were very much like Florida cows; they were probably very intolerant of any frigid conditions accompanying wind chill factors of less than 70 degrees F.<\/p>\n I once believed cows were very intelligent creatures.\u00a0 After all, I had never seen any other animal skydiving with the precision evidenced any Saturday or Sunday in football stadiums across the nation.\u00a0 It was on TV!\u00a0 I saw those \u201cEat More Chik\u2019n\u201d cows with my own eyes!\u00a0 My only question, as I watched them drift down to precise landings in the stadium, was how they were able to pull their ripcords without opposable thumbs?<\/p>\n Well, so much about flying cows.\u00a0 Now I have to go out and put sheets on my shrubbery \u2013 which means one layer less for us.\u00a0 The National Weather Service says we\u2019re in for record lows.\u00a0 This, in our case tonight, is 31 degrees.<\/p>\n I am a little irritated by that. But not half as irritated as I will be next week when the projected low is 22 degrees.<\/p>\n For crying outloud!\u00a0 This is Florida!<\/p>\n -30-<\/p>\n \u00a9 2010 J. Clark<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I realize we Floridians will not gain a bit of sympathy from y\u2019all UPN.\u00a0 But dang it!\u00a0 It\u2019s cold!\u00a0 And this is Florida. Right now, sitting in my office while writing this, the outside air temperature is 39 degrees F.\u00a0 … Continue reading